I sometimes wonder why even though one tries so hard, even though you get hurt and still try, everyone disappoints you, breaks you, lies to you…..
You ever have friends who did the worst to you and you still let them back in but when you do something simple like take time for you they act like their manna and you must beg for them to fed you their sweet nectar?
You ever have someone accuse you of being a bitch because you defended yourself and when you let your guard down with them cause you’re trying not to be a b**ch they hurt you even worse than before?
You ever have someone shut you out because they asked for honesty and when you gave it to them, when you became vulnerable with them they term you as being to needy or judge you for your honesty?
You ever have someone cross a boundary and have them laugh it off like you’re the one with the problem and when you address the issue all of a sudden you’re up tight and need to loosen?
You ever have all this happen and still you find yourself trying yet again with the people who broke you or didn’t care or who did the worse only for them to shut you out even more when you never do that to them?
Sometimes I wonder what’s the point of it all, even though you try, even though you put your pride aside whats the point of this life when it just gets thrown back in your face in end?
That’s why its just a lonely b**chy world but lately it just feels like its not meant to be my world anymore but what do I know right. I’m just a b**ch who cant seem to get it right.
i’m so tired but i am trying so hard not to be otherwise the darkness can take me.